How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
