Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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