Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize
