I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
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