and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
