I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
