Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I'm like, not good at living.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
