return my video game
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
