Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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