There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
