Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
