I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Randomize
