just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
