i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
