are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
