Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Randomize
