96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
This is my gift to your gina
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
