I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
