Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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