She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
