so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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