ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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