We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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