tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I wish i was in the wii world.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
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