I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
