Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
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