I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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