I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
