There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
