I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
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