If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
