marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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