First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
