Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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