i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
