i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
