i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
