Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
