I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Randomize
