For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize
