No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
