was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Still dying that you shit outside
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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