Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
