You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
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