New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
