And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Randomize
