I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize