we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
We don't watch enough power rangers
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
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