That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
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