id be glad to
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
